It all started when I got really tired. I’m in a social sports league where I play volleyball every Tuesday. The sports aspect to the league involves some pretty low key volleyball games and the social part involves going to the bar after the game. It’s pretty fly.
So I was at my Tuesday night volleyball game. We had a late game. We had apparently drawn the short stick and also had to ref after. It was a long night (and not in the fun long night kind of way).
After playing, refereeing and then driving the half hour home I dragged myself to bed, feeling all levels of tired. I turned on my computer (a decidedly bad nighttime ritual) and slowly, ever slowly, began to inch closer and closer to my pillow.
“But wait!” I thought to myself as I drifted closer and closer to the joy of a night’s sleep, “You really ought to get up to wash your face and take your contacts out!”
Fast forward to the morning.
I wake up, the light of day peeping ever so delicately through my window shades. “Oh, look, it’s 8 am” I think to myself. “The sun is shining, the birds are twittering, I’m so glad I got up and took my contacts out – oh crap - it’s 8am?!”
(This is the part of the story where anyone who works or goes to school or generally has a real job probably is thinking that they have this story figured out. Ha. Wait for it.)
My alarm clock is not, for various reasons - most important of which is that I don’t actually want to unplug the alarm clock and then have to reset it - next to my bed. I am also somewhat blind (not in the clinical sense, but it feels like it sometimes). Which means that if I can see my alarm clock from my bed you guessed it – I still have my contacts in!
You know how they say not to sleep in your contacts? Yeeaaahhh, don’t sleep in your contacts.
Sleeping in your contacts can, amongst other unfortunate things, cause your cornea to get scratched, which can lead to blindness.
No, I’m not blind.
But it does feel like it. I’ve been forced out of my contacts and am using eye drops every four hours. For a while there was an eye patch.
Not hot, friends. Not hot.
Subsequently, I had to wear glasses until it healed. While I don’t love having to do this, it’s not a huge deal.
I did, of course, have to wear them during volleyball the next week. No biggie. It’s pretty light hearted stuff and plus, I’ve been playing since I was twelve and what could possibly happen in some little Tuesday night game?
This can now go in the books as the first time I’ve been hit in the face with a volleyball. Actually, “hit” is not an appropriate word, “smashed” is more like it.
Imagine if there was a giant red bulls-eye between my eyes and that’s where the guy decides to spike it as hard as humanly possible. Right in the ol’ money maker. I may have yelled. I may have told the guy to learn how to play volleyball. Possibly.
There was blood from the gash between my eyes, a headache and now an unfortunate looking red mark. Hoorah.
In an attempt to give the giant welt between my eyes a chance to heal, I tried to put my contact lenses back in and managed to re-scratch my cornea, prolonging the healing time (and the wearing of glasses along with it).
Additionally, this weekend I managed to: slice my finger, throw my jaw out of alignment (and subsequently have to pop it back into place) and strain my calf muscle running. Lord.
So yeah, now would be about the time to eat cookies. Because if you’re going to be a scratched up, four-eyes with a crooked jaw and an eye patch, you might as well be fat, too. What the hell.
1 cup butter
1 ½ c. sugar
2 ¾ c. flour à(I replaced 1 c. with whole wheat pastry flour = 1 c. pastry flour + 1 ¾ c. AP flour)
2 tsp. cream of tartar
1 tsp. baking soda
¼ tsp. salt
For the topping:
2 tbs. sugar
1 tbs. cinnamon
Cream the butter, then add the sugar and beat until combined. Add the eggs and beat until incorporated.
In a separate bowl, combine flour, cream of tartar, baking soda and salt. Mix to combine.
Add dry ingredient to wet and mix until just combined - do not over mix. In a separate bowl, combine the sugar and cinnamon for the coating. Using a heaping tablespoon, roll chilled dough into balls with your hands. Coat the outside of the dough balls in the cinnamon/sugar mixture. Place on a cookie sheet.
Bake for 8-10 minutes at 400*F